Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
I need to buy a mesh tank top to fit in in Florida. Where do they even sell that shit?
You stood up and started yelling"Free blow jobs!" because you thought people would like you more.
I was wasted and lost so I called the cops and asked for directions. It seemed logical at the time
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
being able to look good while almost puking is a skill that takes a lot of puking to develop.
Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
You just kept shouting "I AM AN ADULT!" until he agreed to carry you home on his shoulders.
Dude she gave you head while I was in the closet, we've passed the "awkward" phase.
I'm laying in the fetal position on the floor of my kitchen eating potato salad with my fingers. Please come over with some real food and keep me company.
I'm drinking coffee out of a pasta sauce jar and eating fruit soaked in Smirnoff. I think I've hit rock bottom.
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
I'm bonding with your girlfriend. I like her. We're plotting your demise.
So I'm never gonna get to see you again?
Hopefully.
I’m sorry I pressured you for dick pics.
Randomize
