quit re-tweeting John McCain's tweets
he told me I talked like a deaf person
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
i can't believe he threw up on you. Well thats what you get for being DD. I used the sombreros as a shield!
I'll be in my room with a breakfast burrito at 2:30. It's up to you...
He bought you footie pajamas. Shit's pretty serious.
I smell like hot dogs and captain morgan it's 11:20 am what is my life
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
He literally took a shit in my bathroom and then broke up with me.
We can't shop at Hobby Lobby anymore. They don't like Plan B which basically runs through our veins.
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
i'll talk to you in three hours when you've stopped foaming at the mouth and your eyes have rolled back into place
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
Ooooh no. Jesus take the wheel, or Moses. SOMEBODY TAKE THE WHEEL
Randomize
