Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
don't worry. When rigor sets in, we'll make sure to get you laid one last time.
Who the hell brings a 6pack to a party. I'm trying to make mistakes.
Just bought an airhorn. Bad things will happen.
I forgot not everyone drinks wine out of the bottle. My grandma just asked if i needed a glass with a disappointing look.
I wonder what it's like for my roommate to live bicuriously thro my sex life
You just squeezed a person out of you and I'm drunks at 2PM. Our lives got traded and you know it and you're jealous.
According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
Like please, take your microdick and try to stick it someplace else. It is not welcome in my world.
So you told me to remind you that you vomited 3 times in the street because you would forget so here is your reminder
is buying liquor on my lunch break too aggressive?
I'm planning our wedding on the computer and our threesome on my phone. At the same time.
He's completely obsessed with his ex but gives phenomenal head. So overall, yeah, good first date.
I woke up beside him and almost cried. Then I realized you were on the other side so I knew I hadn't made any bad decisions.
Randomize
