Fuck appropriateness.
I just got sparklers from my secret santa. Drunken sledding just got to a whole new level of dangerous
he is literally lying on the floor eating cookies. doing nothing. and as i was hitting him he needed to protect the cookies more than himself.
Still drunk just puked in the meat cooler tried to clean it up with ham. Its not working
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
We could supplement the Tour with Edward Andre-hands. Because 40s are for the 99%.
Regular drunk falling on flat ground did not prepare me for drunk falling into a pile of firewood.
Who knew drunk me could climb a 17 story building for apple juice and sex
He sent me a mirror pic of himself and sent it to me and all i could think about was the amazing bong hits i took with his roommate in that bathroom.
I`m watching Shallow Hal & Jack Black has better nipples than Jimmy's chick.
My mom just drunk texted me complaining about her genitals smelling like Taco Bell. I really am her son
Fuck you. Leave my nipples out of this. THEY DID NOTHING TO YOU
He told me he sees me like a sister then 10 mins later tried to make out with me.
She puked in the bed, peed in the closet, and woke up on a Rubbermaid in the closet under the stair case
It was terrible. I am sore from head to toe, neither of us got off, and we were at it for an hour and a half, I faked having a heart episode so we could stop. It worked.
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