I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
I woke up this morning and was hoping we drank enough last night to have a unicorn drawn on my wrist. Good News: We did.
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
I'm telling you the guy came in bought a box of condoms and all three of the chicks that came in behind him followed him to his car. I want his life
Peeing in public by noon, this is not a good indicator for the day.
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
me blowing you awake is the exact turn i want our relationship to take
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
I'm worried about your health. And your boobs. Actually, health, then boobs. Health first, boobs second. And third.
If I call him daddy should I get him a father's day card? Serious question
Also I just had a pointless meeting and the only thing I accomplished were my kegals
He just peed in the cab. I repeat..IN.
Do you think he will let me wear my neck fan while he throws my back out?
Please shut the fuck up.
Randomize
