Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
they were having a wine tasting so i tasted every wine...then knocked over an entire display of gourmet olives and was asked to leave... but they still let me buy my 6 bottles of wine before escorting me out
in case you were wondering, even a BJ under a blanket on the back of a bus only lifts a 14-hour bus ride to borderline tolerable.
After I finished inserting the catheter he said he thought my name was familiar. Didn't have the nerve to tell him he was my fifth grade teacher.
Somehow I've got the party rigged to where I get a foot massage every time someone wants a beer out of the fridge. Hellz yeah
either i huffed spraypaint or ate out that makeup artist. you decide.
Sometimes a girl needs 4 shots of whiskey in her diet coke at 5 in the afternoon and i feel no shame in admitting that girl is me
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
He was so aggressive it felt like he was giving my boob a root cannal
Don't judge me. It's a Monday night and I can eat burritos in while bathing in the kitchen sink if I want to.
Peeing in taco bell cups is part of the fun of going to taco bell
I came so hard my ears popped.
He put on star wars porn, i thought it was hilarious last night but now i'm wondering why he has star wars porn
Thanks for fucking the skin off my dick
It was a joint effort between my vagina my feet and your hand you can't just blame that all on me
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
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