We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
Missed another period
I almost hope you're pregnant, this is unfair.
you made sure you came back for your bottle of vodka but didn't remember to take your shoes
After four attempts, his condom would not flush. I had to remove it with salad tongs.
I apparently insisted on hugging all the bushes and apologizing for pollution on the way home.
I'm wearing a real bra and real shoes. I look like a fucking lady.
i think the theme of this summer is "shitting in weird locations."
Oh you know same old same old. just eating pizza after faking extreme night terrors to get a one night stand to leave my apartment
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
So the TSA can feel me inside and out in front of 40 people, but they catch me fucking in the bathroom 20 feet away and all of a sudden their the decency police
He was asleep with his head on a windowsill and you were petting his head, then you almost left the kitchen and then went back to pet him some more.
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
oh and i figured out why we kept smelling vomit. ive got vomit on my socks. putting the heater on my feet was not the best of ideas.
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
Randomize
