It was like my butthole was peeing. Felt comforting yet not fulfilling.
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
Ok, was I really fucked up or was there a chick from Norway in the ice cream shop teaching us Norwegian last night?
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
I woke up naked on my futon with a blanket half way covering my ass and 20 half eaten chicken wings on my chest... At 7 pm... That kind of day drinking
Apparently I was proudly showing him the cup I barfed pizza rolls into
She flashed them and they let her pay with Monopoly money. I'm married, so it is your obligation as my best man to repeatedly fuck her for me
Dude, half of south Mississippi has seen my taint. I'm not worried.
so, i guess i gotta chill on showing up to work hungover... someone anonymously left a bible in my work mailbox (no one else got one)
three of my fingers are bleeding and the only thing on my phone rn is a google search of 'Allison Janney'
There are peanut butter donuts now. We are playing with forces we can't possibly understand.
Mid-fucking he screams "YOU CAN'T VOTE FOR TRUMP"
I feel like I shouldn't be left around 30 year olds when I'm drunk
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
Randomize