There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
It's a pity Stephen Hawking can't do sarcasm.
There's an old bald Japanese dude on the metra next to me. He's drinking MGD on a crowded train, and rocking out way too hard to what may be the same Dallas Green song I'm listening to. Life is sweet.
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
I think all I remember saying is, "I love Chris Berman's voice" and then I passed out
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
The president of the frat said he was honored to award me "Best Overall Blow Jobs", free admission to all their future parties, and a $20 gift certificate to Denny's. I'm not sure if I feel proud or if that's just the burrito coming back up...
Also, what are the symptoms of syphilis?
There's always a certain something about a day that begins with your panties in your purse.
After my date left I rallied and took the Asian girl home. Flexibility my friend.
you said you couldn't hang because you had to masturbate and feed your lizard
So then I got so stoned I sat and took my pulse for 10 minutes.
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
Randomize
