i'm starting to get pissed at how pandora is trying to force coldplay on me
dude my grandmas the shit. she has a sixth grade education and got hit by a car when she was 18. she cant smell.
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
I admit it's going to be hard to top a limo orgy and Mcnuggets....but I have faith in you
So hungover. They actually hid easter eggs around me.
Fuck your 100 proof Hot Damn. Do you know what 100 proof vomit tastes like? Anger.
I told him id do anything with him and he said angry pirate? So I said okay. Never seeing him again.
What's an angry pirate?
You dont want to know. If someone offers say no. Never ever do the angry pirate. Ever.
So i am officially handcuffed to the pole on the party bus while taking jello shots.....this shall be an interesting night
I'm proud of you, you were pretty classy last night, you didn't puke AND you didn't take off your shirt, except for those two times in the corner.
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
this isn't the first time drunken padiddle ended in a fist fight..
Dude...itll be a youre-still-a-dick-but-a-hot-one-angry-hate-evil-spite kinda fuck. This is acceptable.
I see more hoeing in ur future
He’s exactly what I’m looking for: he’s got a broken heart, a working penis and a new boat!!!
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