she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
Dude dan is so baked he taped his remote to the futon so he couldn't lose it again. Come over here
Mom's drinking. Just asked her if she was good to walk back to the condo. She seemed unsure until she remembered she brought the GPS. We are 2 blocks from the condo.
Why is your vibrator in the fridge?
I'm testing sex in Alaska before I go there.
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
I'm in a hotel full of Marines. I'm leaving here pregnant.
My dog just threw up a condom. Sorry for accusing you of not wearing one, I found it now.
Just traded a sandwich for anxiety drugs outside the club. I fuckin' LOVE this place.
The George Foreman grill is melted. I don't know what other problems could arise.
This weekend I was almost blinded by a cumshot to the eye, so happy Labor Day I guess
Her ex was at the party her housemates were having. He knocked on her door asking how she was while we were going at it. Turns out they were trying to work things out. Don't think I'll ever forget his face when we walked out of her room.
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
Do NOT. I repeat. DO NOT call me little one after we have fucked. In no world is that ok. Even jesus agrees.
Randomize
