dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
First, he can't make me cum.. And now, he can't get it up because he LOVES me?!!??! i don't think so.
He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
and that's when the elephants and penises started dancing on the ceiling
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
so I'm coping with getting the "I'm not over my ex" bomb dropped on me by getting drunk and yelling at people while wearing a purple princess hat
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
We could supplement the Tour with Edward Andre-hands. Because 40s are for the 99%.
Tonight, a friend walked in and said "oh look at that. Drunk on the living room floor. Just as expected." this is my life. This is my life.
OMG BTW REMEMBER HOW HE ORDERED PIZZA THAT ONE TIME WE HOOKED UP. APPARENTLY HE WAS HANDING IT OUT TO PEOPLE WHO LIVE IN MY BUILDING AS HE WAS LEAVING
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
He offered to dress his dick up as Charlie Chaplin to cheer me up.
Keep him.
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
The cards I get dealt on tinder now are karma for fucking a married man while I was in high school.
Randomize
