I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
Why do my orgasm prompt her to begin using babytalk EVERYTIME?!
and my herpes radar will keep us safe
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
I knew we would be good together when you made me lick jameson off your boob while you screamed along with racks on racks
Also since my birthday I've on average fucked a new guy every 12.5 days. I'm doing an excel spreadsheet
I woke up to a 3rd person picture of my own dick sent from a 1-800 number..
He puked over my shoulder into the toilet. The guy in the next stall sounded totally appalled.
this could be the second dad I've smoked weed with
You can't just be this socially awkward and sexually frustrated and jealous as a fucking demon and be expected to stay sober.
After a while I was so wet that I started crying. HE MADE ME SO HORNY I WEPT.
Apparently this establishment won't let you rent a sailboat if you have been drinking rum all morning
Like, bro, how do you think I got the idea to go sailing
The cashier looked at my basket, looked at me and said "That's a lot of wine." I looked at her and said "Mother in law." She nodded approvingly.
SUFFER THE WRATH OF THE PISS BAG
Randomize
