White coat. Heels.
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
I'm sorry i ruined our friendship with a boner
If you're that baked in a class full of people that know you're that baked you tend to offer up a peace offering. Its like the burrito of trust! If eaten you are now obligated to help maintain my grades and keep me from falling out of my chair. $3.75 a morning is worth it for that mafia type protection!
It has become abundantly clear why you give me pixie stix when you're drunk now...
I mean it was like cry my eyes out or masturbate in my moms bathroom.
If we're single and alone together, the fuck angels shall sing upon our nude bodies.
Had a turkey baster with clean pee in it in my pants to pass a drug test, and the bottom fell off, so yeah I'm pretty pissed.
So I definitely tried to pay a cab with baseball tickets last night
Used my brand new sperrys as a trash can to throw up in and woke up with someone's random key in my hair...new year new me:)
I just realized I wasn't at the party anymore. I was just sitting there with a vacuum.
roommate singing save a horse ride a cowboy wearing a cowboy hat a bikini and jeans while humping the couch.
Like sometimes I’ll be hangry but for dick
Randomize
