i'm at a stripclub and this bitch just lit her nipples on fire!
Well for starters i'm drinking vodka out of a bell pepper.
eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
i just wasnt prepared to have the baby of one of two french firemen. threesomes are too confusing.
I know she was blacked out, but she looked directly at the toilet and said "we meet again"
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
its official: beach shits are the exact same as mountain shits
OH GOD NOT SANTA BABY. NO NO NO. YOU'RE LIKE 85. OMG MULTIPLE WOMEN. NO NO NO STAHP.
Im going to be coked out with hello kitty fire arms. Valentines day can suck my dick
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
I just loudly threatened to kill a self checkout machine
Homeboy just asked me to strip for him. He should not be this horny and allowed to be in Vegas with his kid.
The longer the dick, the closer to Jesus when you’re on top.
No I'm not high but I did cry for over an hour tonight because I realized that they never made a sequel to "Under the Tuscan Sun" with Diane Lane.
Randomize
