I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
Do you remember giving me altiods and wishing me good luck on the walk home?
my mom was in labor with me for 32 hours, it's only fair to start drinking now.
All i remember was you crying naked on the bathroom floor because you were cold. I got you a blanket and you kept kicking it off and crying because you were still cold.
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
she asked me where ive been her entire life and the guy in the room next to us yelled "with other women bitch!"
Your car is in front of my house. Keys are in the mailbox. There is a fire hydrant in your trunk. Happy Birthday
Did you blackout Saturday before or after we had sex in a random snow bank?
Why is there multiple peanut butter and toasts stuck to the fridge door?
You have to just make a conscious effort not to make out with people when he's around if you want to keep him in your life?
It was like sex on an active volcano surrounded by the night sky and bloodhounds. And by that I mean it was nice.
he kissed both of us goodnight when we dropped him off...I didn't know if I was more offended or impressed
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
His ass is a ten, but his personality is a two. Which would average to a six if I didn't have to figure in apologizing to all and sundry. In short hard no. Get a new wingman.
Randomize