whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
I woke up with a solved rubics cube in my purse
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
We're gona eat taco bell and then take exlax and see who can hold it in the longest. Loser has to pay for drinks all weekend. You in?
My face feels like its stuck between a ball sack and an asshole.
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
those kids just got delivered to the party by the pizza guy
STOP SETTING ME UP WITH GUYS YOU MEET ON CRAIGSLIST
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
It was sweet, he carried me out of my bathroom after I passed out, built me a pillow fort so I wouldn't roll out of bed, set a glass of water on the table, and brought me a mixing bowl to puke in. Totally a sign we're more than just fuckbuddies.
before i went to bed i wrote myself a note that says 'i feel all swirly'
I often wonder if we’re introverted extroverts, but I don’t think so. I think we’re just easily tired scumbags
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