I'm waiting for seagulls to eat this throw up
Its 11am, im in the city in a pocahontas outfit, lost a heel and found a gold rolex in my lingerie.
You could probably play six degrees of separation of my cock in this city.
FYI If I die in my sleep it is because I drank a bottle of coke from 1986. I needed a mixer
I am making pancakes and watching Spongebob Squarepants. My life is a waste of youth.
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
The liquor stores are closed! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! CURSE YOU SANDY!!!!
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
You crowd surfed from beer pong into the bathroom where you spent the rest of the night, also I have your wallet
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
Also the fuck cup must be buried with me
It's funny that when I fall down as an adult I'm so much happier no one saw than that I'm not seriously hurt.
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
I just sold Adderall to a priest, im not quite sure how I feel about this situation
My ex unfollowed me on SPOTIFY bruh. Freaking spotify. The butthurt is real
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