I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
white shorts are a girls way of saying "im ready to fuck cuz its not my time of month"
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
eat the baked goods on the counter at your own risk... i made them while i was angry and drunk so they most likely have pubes in them
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
Dude, had to, it's Canada Day, I fucked her for Canada. Seriously, I put my Canadian flag on my bed and fucked her on it.
Pretty sure that I got the MVP of wedding reception... woke up on the bench in the hallway of a hotel and we did NOT start the night there.
So he was supposed to be helping me with my math but instead we ended up drinking coconut rum in his basement and having sex. I think my mom was right, getting a tutor will be good for me. Relieves the stress.
I'm about one sudden movement away from being able to cross "throw up in a fortune 100 company's bathroom" off my bucket list.
I'm like a walking PSA for tequila shots
She showed me her tits and my first thought was "I want these to feed my future children." I'm scared.
No alcohol sales on Election Day. WTF? Today, of all days, I need to be splurged to to vote for any of these morons running for president.
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
Randomize
