week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
I just made easy mac in my blender. Beat that.
Why is the garage door in the middle of the street?
Our drug dealer just got busted, wear black tmrw
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
Please tell me you've ingested more than weed and Oreos today
First stoner thought of the day: Life would be so much better if there were more things that were biscuits and gravy flavored.
woke up to a family dragging me under their beach umbrella, they poured water on me bc they "thought I was dead" then fed me quesadillas and nursed me back to health... gotta love Cabo
Your "dubstep at ceilis" resulted in a random naked guy busting into my room and peeing all over my bathroom
My CPA just snapchatted me a picture of her playing beer pong at a picnic. Time to do my own taxes?
A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
I'm driving home wearing one sock, boxers, and a tee shirt. That's how good it was
Nothing says I love you like a silicone dragon dick
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
The thing I'm gonna miss about him is his dick.
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