I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
that thing about your dad's boner was meant to be a compliment
Maryland truck stops are full of people with killer mustaches
this girl im hooking up with thought my ring was a purity ring... apparently im taking it too slow
The waiter to-go cupped my bloody mary without me even asking. THAT hungover.
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
Thanks for alerting everyone in our apartment what your one night stand's name is. Could you scream a little louder?
Just don't let me fall on anything that can be broken. Unless its a dick
Like, actually questioning if you ate dog shit last night
There's only two more days left to say you saw me naked this year.....I'll bring the booze, you got all of next year to rationalize why.
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
You and your dick were a topic of high regard tonight
He calculated like a serious conversion in his head the other day and got a crazy number and I was like damn that’s hot please proceed to take your clothes off.
All i want from a relationship is to get drunk watch pirates of the Caribbean and have sex
Randomize
