It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
And my fence, why is part of it on the roof?
She told me to stuff her like a turkey. She actually yelled happy thanksgiving.
you kind of just crawled on top of him. that was the point at which i became concerned with how drunk you were.
I tried carrying you from the bathroom to your bed and you begged me to bring the toilet too
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
Most likely. calling 911 isnt usually something i do the first time i hang out w. someone, but hey. its a good story now.
I woke up using a pile of socks as a pillow. I think theyre clean so thats a plus.
Sorry about the whole your mom seeing my face up your ass situation
Fucked him in his sketchy van in the Applebee's parking lot. In other news, my dry spell is over.
So I bought that bathing suit yesterday and got buyers remorse so I returned it today and then stole it. Win win.
I can hear the pillow talk now, "how many condoms did you bring? Good, put them all on,"
My weirdest encounter with a stranger though was when for some reason they just gave me a box of unopened socks. Needless to say, I never used them.
you fell asleep with her panties on your face. how are you surprised??
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