The guy I fucked in the port a poty just called me and asked me on a date!
Awkward!
No he was cute and I said yes!
I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...
yeah, but the likliness of me finding my husband at a party where the facebook event is titled "NEW YEARS EVE SHIT SHOW" is highly unlikely
Your like the Mozart of blow jobs, you make every other girl seem like cheesy elevator music.
We call it lazy sex. We just lay next to each other and help each other masturbate. that way we can both be on bottom.
hey, sorry about all the butter. I thought it was gonna help.
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
i swear, as soon as they invent a cure for herpes, he's mine.
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
oh I'm washing fake blood out of my bra.
I NEED to hang out with you more
This summer has already been like the best summer ever. FREEDOM IS AWESOME. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND GOD BLESS THE SINGLE LIFE.
the bouncer just handed me a Starbucks bag of pound cake
I woke up with clothes on this morning and I'm pretty sure you had something to do with that. Thank you.
Randomize
