During sex he started singing that song in Forgetting Sarah Marshall--"Inside of You"--by Russell Brand
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
I told her that I thought she needed an oral mammogram. With me being pre-med she bought it.
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
I just got licked by a stripper, not so great anymore.
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
and then you looked me right in the eyes and said "i just really wanna pet some horses right now"
We met a guy named Raymond. You called him ramen all might and told him you would eat him up, "like sex, on a budget."
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
She jumped on a table and took off her shirt and started yelling things that no one understood. For being 3, she has a dead on impression of a drunk party girl.
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
I woke up this morning with 3 phone numbers, a red Chinese New Year envelope with cash in it, and a winning scratcher all stuffed in my bra. I'd say it was a pretty successful Thursday night.
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
Remind me to tell you the story of the fuzzy condom
i was so high when i left this morning that rather than make sandwiches i threw bread and peanut butter in my backpack. a whole loaf. and a whole jar
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