I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
Please tell me how you drunkenly remembered your social security number when we were checking you into the ER.
I doubt were getting our security deposit back... the toilet just fell off the wall
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
Bro I am trying to have one night stands nothing more, unless she is baking waffles I can eat out of her butthole I am not interested
Just had the best random sex ever with a girl I picked up from a pro choice rally uptown. God bless the Democratic National Convention.
Oh I was gonna ask you the same thing...? It's official ask anyone to see your husbands dick day.
The DJ was throwing glowsticks into the crowd and managed to smack one guy in the face with them
Well I'm going to hell. But I'm going after multiple orgasms.
Its a shame I cant put 'bomb ass head game' on my resume.
So as you were leaving, you leaned on the table too much and 3 glasses slid and fell to the floor. You then looked at me and said "To be honest, glass isnt that expensive anyways" and stumbled out of the bar.
lets face it, we have a liquor cabinet with a designated chocolate shelf
I haven't even lived here for 24 hours yet, and I've already banged someone. My new hoe life is off to a great start.
Remember how slutty I thought she was when we were freshmen?
Yeah! But that was a long time ago. Plus, you use your sluttiness for good!
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