I just puked in an auto zone parking lot. I'm never eating peanut butter and red wine for dinner again.
Apparently I masturbate in my sleep now.
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
I wake up every morning and wish that I didn't have to wear a bra
Going to a party tonight. Sorority girls will be there. Primary goal of the night: make one cry. Secondary goal: become a father.
We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
you screamed santa and jumped in front of 50 kids to tell him you wanted a bong for christmas.
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
Yeah I was convinced everyone knew I was high. Time was passing way too slowly for anyone NOT to notice.
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
Haha sweet. I'm being the Mad Hatter. I'll be drinking out of a tea cup all night. Or at least until I inevitably lose it, break it, or use it as a weapon.
scotch tastings during the week is a baaad idea. i woke up w no pants but wearing my winter coat
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