I think someone spiked my drink last night. .. Like all 20 of them.
I got three cases. When they asked for id I said it was suspended for drunk driving.
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
You do realize that you're sleeping with a man who is part of a gay harem, right?
You told me to pour the Gatorade on you "like Flashdance"
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
When I found her she was drinking wine out of a plastic bag in a bathroom stall, staring at herself in the mirror and crying hysterically. Cabo does things to a person...
You were running around yelling "BUKAKE!" and squirting people with a shampoo bottle you found. Total shitshow.
It might have taken me 30 minutes but I finally finished the toast I made. That hungover.
I'm holding onto the sink for dear life. Pretty sure if Iet go I'll turn into a shit propelled man rocket.
Explaining that I bought them at a strip club gift shop with my friend didnt make the furry handcuffs seem less weird
He's only giving you free adderall so you can focus on his dick.
Welp. June's off to a great start. I just ripped my pants, completely sober, at 10:30 p.m.
Hey! you should come over!
Who is this? The number is saved as "Sexy Awesome"
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