i just saw a man dusting the fake palm trees at the mall
...welcome to nebraska
so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
You drank the expired grape juice because you were convinced it had fermented into wine...you have a problem.
No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
Stop selling my mother weed! She's annoying as hell when she's stoned.
There's a homeless man outside the bar. I have a toothbrush and toothpaste in my car. I think i'm going to give them to him. And they said drinking is bad.
You're so thoughtful.
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
Does it qualify as sexting if you're both pretending to be fictional characters?
I'm not sure whether to be proud of you or weirded out.
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
if my uterus stops caving in on itself long enough for me to be alive I'm there
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
so i fell out of a tree on the ave last night. someone told me there was alcohol at the top. bastards.
Tonight I totally got eaten out in the old school photo booth in the mall. Will send you pics of the photo reel asap
Randomize
