Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
Dipping chips in queso and thinking of your beautiful face
ever had your bank call you to verify the 4 seperate bar transactions from the night before? I have
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
He invited me to see "alison wonderland" WHAT THE FUCK THATS NOT A FIRST NAME/LAST NAME TYPE DEAL
his semen tasted like maple syrup. no wonder fat girls always wanna fuck him.
her cat was choking so she kept trying to stick her finger in her cat's mouth while saying "it's okay kitty, just do what mommy does"
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
Couldn't see or hear that well because she hit me on the back of the head with a bat. That is my excuse. Also the gin.
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
For every drunk face picture you send me, I'm gonna send a wholesome family photo.
I hope you have a dream of a sloth with my face touching you erotically
I had to sit there with his three fat aunts talking about a bunch of 50 Shades knockoff books.
I felt like a taxi, but my meter was running up minutes he would be eating me out that night.
Your "dubstep at ceilis" resulted in a random naked guy busting into my room and peeing all over my bathroom
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
Randomize
