where am i from again
I hated hipsters before it was mainstream.
I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
So when I got her home I realized being a lesbian again isn't like riding a bike...
Fucking plugged the shower with taquitos I just threw up.
We got three kegs and a backhoe. Now taking bets on what charges we end up getting arrested for. Will need bail money.
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
I hope my tampon is in his bed. That'll teach him. Happy new years btw
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
I might stash a bottle of vodka in your mailbox, that way if I wanna leave early I can drink in your frontyard till you get back.
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
And he listens to me when I talk to him like the hulk.
Only thing that feels right is being horizontal in the fetal position
He kept telling me my vagina was a pleasure cave... I ended up just taking it as a complimetn
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
Randomize
