How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
He came through my line today and bought designer impostor perfume, just for men gel, and astroglide. I almost DIED.
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
Sweating vodka and spray tan, I feel like a trophy wife.
the best part of christmas was when my mom opened the handcuffs that were supposed to be for jen. Surprisingly, not the most awkward situation of the day.
She made sure everyone knew we were doing shots for her dead grandma.
I think I used my hospital ID to cut the coke last night. I need to swab it for residue at work today.
People try and tell me I never learn me lesson, well that's a bunch of crap. I asked for Monday off for Superbowl recovery based on my experience last year.
Self care is breaking into nasa and launching yourself directly into the fucking void
I was really excited when I saw a billboard for neverbethirsty.org this morning. Then I realized it was for a church.
My son's girlfriend just thanked me for having good penis genes.
Okay I’ll say it... THIS MOVIE FUCKS
That’s probably the first time I've heard Little Women described that way and I love it
Idk I just think that seeing that man's Twitter always resulting in me looking for the whiskey is a bad sign
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