Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
you're right.
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
When I finally got there you were bleeding all over and you just kept saying over and over that the dog was your only friend at the party.
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
We've gotten 3 pitchers already by trading for CUPCAKES
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
Nothing bad can happen when you have a kiwi flavored condom. Absolutely nothing.
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
Got home and told boyfriend what happened. He was like "you made out with a guy you call Balls Deep?" and hi-fived me.
Xanax and full house Tuesday is now Percocet Sunday
Okay so my roommate deals some drugs so whenever he leaves we can hook up, be ready
I didn't know I was the on call booty call damn
I can't believe I slept with a girl who has the words shucks in her vocabulary. I'm getting less picky by the day..
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