He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
You want looks pregnant, is pregnant, or the one with a kid.
While I'm in the bathroom taking a piss you think of a way to get us the hell out of here.
no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
It was like his mom forgot to breastfeed him and he was making up for lost time.
Walked girl from last night to car as gf was driving up. Got slow clap from neighbors.
Stop giving guys blow jobs because you're no good and it's messing up my sex life. Word gets around & then they think it's me and don't believe me when I say I have a twin. Learn to stuck dick right.
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
Why is there uncooked bacon under my bed?
You insisted on taking it to bed with you. You grabbed it out of the fridge while mumbling "If I leave this out, you fuckers are just going to ruin it."
You had sex with a mute, how is that not funny
He had to put the child locks on the windows so you would stop screaming at random boys
And when I feel bad about myself I go to the library and suck my pen over an open book, counting the seconds until a guy sits across from me and tries to get my attention
It's one of those "I can't stand you but we're stuck in the same hotel room tonight so let's fuck until one of us passes out" kind of nights.
I had sex with a boy who lives in a closet, that's like having sex with Harry Potter, right?
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