Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
The way you explained my vagina was exactly the way I would of described my breakfast burrito.
Either she got face surgery at midnight, or i need to stop drinking...
So apparently I shook her hand very polite, said weiner and walked away
high. he's playing 'oops i did it again' on the ukelele. is this real life?
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
We've given up. My vagina is tired of constant lonely nights and disappointments. This is our retirement.
There's "red head", "preppy white girl" and "the two Asians I dated and now everyone thinks I like Asians"
Your dating history is like the united colors of Benetton
So, if you eat too many protein bars, you will shit your pants. This I learnt today..... at work.
In other news, I tore a tendon in my hand from giving my boyfriend handjobs so that's how my day is going
You stumbled into the hotel room escorted by security and then went into the bathroom sat by the toilet, threw up for hours while slamming your head on the wall and whimpering "why" over and over.. I went to bed
are you still alive?
no.
i'll cry at your funeral. and leave a burrito by your tombstone
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