The only reason why I invited him to my party was because he is suicidal.
oh my god i am going to vomit. and little burgers wearing crowns are going to come out.
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
i took my sailor hat off and used it as a vom bucket
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
this is not the first time I've had hot dogs and 151 for thanksgiving.
Things I have learned since the start of my first college spring break: do not fart in an enclosed space (such as a shower stall) when hungover. You will throw up. More lessons to follow as week continues.
It was awkward at first he now knows I fucked his little brother, they were both there. then the tequila kicked in and everything was fine.
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
He cannot be your sugar daddy. He looks like a literal hot dog.
Eating power bars and masterbating... That's kinda my life right now. Is this what having a boyfriend means?
Um. Did you take a picture of me with a giant dildo after we went bowling?
This is even better than the wine from my laundry basket
She said she was sorry for rolling around in her own vomit. Honestly, I thought it really added to the party.
i ordered what the bartender said was called a pink cock, and kept saying it tastes like a disney princess. thats how my 21st bday went
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