he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
i found her turbo button.....if you know what i mean.
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
Just taught my suite how to queef. I feel like i'm back in 9th grade!
We were making out when she went into convulsions. At least now I know she's allergic to peanuts.
The view from the bathroom floor this morning is fabulous
someday when you wake up in a dumpster we'll have to have this conversation again...
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
you puked on the porch, i can see your jacket on the floor next to your underwear. i know your home, unchain the door, you're the worst roommate ever.
Well despite the fact that I'm still not entirely sure this isn't an elaborate/cunning plan to kill me, I'm in.
i think i need to institute a "if your dick has been in my mouth this year i get a xmas present" policy
Apparently at 2 AM I decided to let the world know about my newfound love for elephants
Sorry, I was watching the Olympic story about the Canadian guy and drinking out of the prescription bottle and crying because it was so beautiful.
He also ordered me a vibrator last week, so the flowers kind of balance it out
You have no concept of how high I am, do you?
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