Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
I really need to stop coming home drunk and lint rolling my rabbit.
He compared my vagina to the first time he tried cocaine
i get the sense she is planing new and exciting ways to physically harm me during sex
you dont understand this isnt a sit at a sports bar eating wings and having a beer night. this is a show up to the bar with a fith of Jack and just let what happens happen kinda night. im expecting to smack a bouncer
Ok let me change into clothes i can run in
i would have fingered myself to death by now but the dog wont stop staring at me
I got whiskey, so I think the blizzard and I are at an even match
The guy next to me just said he wont play beer pong on principle. Im scared.
I just pulled a seven inch black hair out of my ass. Pretty sure that means we're dating now
I might as well just sew it shut at this point.
He's a drill sergeant! The sadomasochist in me can't resist that.
I've never sung with balls in my mouth
Randomize
