btw ... thanks for not giving me up as the craigslist killer
i owe you one
thanks for snagging those panties for me
We need to rekindle our bromance
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
WHAT DO YOU MEAN I DIDN'T APOLOGIZE? THERE WAS A PEACE OFFERING MADE VIA TACO BELL.
He tied my whole arm, in its cast, to the headboard first. He mumbled something about safe, sane, and consensual?
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
Doors open. I'm laying in bed watching caddy shack and drinking a vodka tonic.
And I'm out of vodka so bring vodka or 2013 will blow ass
He said the first movie he ever jerked off to was Titanic because he knew "they were totally doing it in that car."
I FINALLY GET TO MASTURBATE. SO EXCITED.
I didnt realize until i got your email that what i've been missing in my life is someone to send me dog gifs
What procrastination leads to: I have submitted a third of my job applications this week with a BAC that would get me arrested
Just had a med school interview with that doctor I fucked in college. He remembered. Asked if I still have my nipple rings. Overall, I think it went well.
I guess you know it was a good night when you find your ripped underwear in your pocket, and a nerf bullet falls out of your pant leg 😂😂
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
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