Last-second stop at the drug store for lube and condoms. Clerk said "So uhmmm...that's a done deal, huh?"
High five!
she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
I took your shirt off for you after you threw up on yourself, read you the ugly duckling, and then tucked you in. you better fucking love me, jackass.
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
cool, get new shit, I dnt want the same old if it's my last drink ever
The world isn't ending you idiot. I'll grab beer
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
He pulled over in the Compass Bank parking lot so I could dry-heave, but I decided I couldn't vomit there because "I bank here."
The guy I blew last night was pierced in multiple places. I had to use extra caution to avoid my temporary filling.
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
You thought the flashing lights were strobe lights when they were loading you into the ambulance. You asked the EMT if he had any X.
Not sure she's stomping around my apartment muttering incoherently about wanting to speak to the colonel
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
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