I'm pretty sure his head is too big to fit between my legs. Worthless.
We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
Through a series of unfortunate circumstances, I think I just sprayed lime juice on my vagina.
Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
do not get into a discussion with my roommate when im sitting there naked ever again.
i sat alone in my bed and ate pizza and garlic fingers. The icing on the cake was hearing your moans from down the hall.
Based on the pics I have taken of hookups while they were passed out or sleeping, I have scientifically concluded that no two vagina lips are the same. They are like snowflakes.
hey, its the girl who gave you a bloody nose and paid you back with a blow job. have you seen my shoes?
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
Whatever, consider condoms an eighteen year investment.
I could probably save all of the money I would have spent on condoms and put a kid through college.
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
I'm at the point in my life where I'm gonna sell my eggs for cash
Please wake up and help me figure out how I woke up on the floor with my head under the couch
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
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