People kept wishing me happy birthday last night. apparently i was 21st birthday drunk
part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. it's tragic
found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
That's the girl I met who was peeing on the driveway with me. We bonded
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
With the amount of g's you put on going I'm gonna guess you're drinking alone again
He said and I quote "Had to beat one off in the Burger King bathroom before I went over." Thats somebody that takes pride in his work.
last night on the strip the guy screamed at you YOU GOTTA WORK ON YOUR CALVES.
My day in three words: secret purse cake
I just bought a 1/4 oz of pot from a coworker who's old enough to be my grandfather...I'm never leaving Portland.
...I watched him run on the beach yesterday and I think I started ovulating
Btw, the reason I have a black eye is bc I needed to puke so hard yesterday morning; I whipped up the toilet seat so fast that I railed myself in the face. Then spent the rest of the day more carefully puking. Kind of why I'm not in the mood for drinking.
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
Dont you look at me in that tone of voice
Panties = found
Randomize
