His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
I would say a second date is not looking likely, I acciedentally bit his penis. it's still bleeding 43 minutes later.
if I want to go home with a foreign boy, please feel free to let me go, sober me gives you permission to let drunken me do it
I DON'T CARE WHAT THE CIRCUMSTANCES ARE NEVER VOMIT IN MY PURSE AGAIN.
Jason and steven are boiling shrimp in the microwave again
My mouth holds just enough water for my bong
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
All I remember from the concert was leaving in an RV full of middle aged people playing circle of death
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
Themes for tonight: men who look like bill Gates but sing smash mouth songs. Women who's names are also food. Haircuts that DO NOT cover bald spots.
It's my birthday weekend! I'm getting a Brazilian and he's going to fucking Arkansas. Where the fuck are his priorities?
He held my hand in public and I nearly came. Like he needs to be inside of me yesterday.
Woke up next to a slice if pizza. From what i can tell I tried to plug it into my phone charger. No more blackout wednesdays for this girl.
My brain is a dvd screensaver and I'm allowed to have a good thought when it hits the corner
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