Walking by Farrand Field is better than a porno right now.
That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
I wanted to google "huge banana" but I'm pretty sure all I'd get is dick pictures.
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
And I just want to be like your tongue is not a FUCKING sword
the guy sitting next to me at the bar has a patrick swayze tattoo hovering over a roast beef sandwich. 'merica.
Not every day do you see a hooker getting arrested at noon. Just kidding, we live in Reno.
"Do You Wanna Build a Snowman" came on while I was riding his dick. I had to take a moment.
Fair warning birthday party last night avoid kitchen & upstairs bathroom if you value your remaining sanity
I'm at the point in my life where I'm gonna sell my eggs for cash
The Australian strangers convinced me to leave him behind when they started chanting Aussie Aussie Aussie, Oy Oy Oy, and told me they had a bunch of beer at their place.
I named my Roomba after my pot dealer. I have a problem, don't i?
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
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