how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
debating whether or not to save the package from my first plan b pill. it would be a nice addition to any baby book.
you dragged me by my throat over to the shots. this is a new level of alcoholism..
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
You stumbled in the house, mumbled something about a cheese party, grabbed a block of cheese and the whiskey, and left.
she gave me head while wearing a sombrero and told me it was her "welcome to south of the border" blowjob. i am never leaving mexico.
BTW waking up to a picture of you taking a shot of what I can only assume was shitty lukewarm liquor out of a blow up dolls butt made my day
For months it was all good and well just having sex. Now, something in me has snapped and I'm dreaming of taking turtleneck Christmas pictures with him. Fuck you, we're going out tonight. I need this.
And I feel like pitchers of margaritas accidentally make it down your throat a lot.
I mean, the lady at the Mexican restaurant insisted. She said she would win a prize if she sold another pitcher before noon. And plus I got to wear a sombrero
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
But it's ok cause then I turned my tequila blanket into a tequila comforter and I felt no pain
My night just got really weird. In a sit down stall bathroom at this nice resturaunt and this guy walks in as I rip a humongous porcelain-splitting fart. Well, I hear him stop for a second. He then opens the door to the stall next to mine, sits down and says, "player two has entered the game."
Did you win?
New life goal: fuck in the shopping cart
Does sending her to the conference instead of a competent employee and putting her in a suite make up for banging her husband behind her back?
No, but she’ll have a nice memory when she gets dumped and fired on the same day.
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