I'm trying to bond with my sister... Its like getting to know a person I never met that I don't like
She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
Just ate applesauce I laced with percocets for dinner. I'm pretty sure my grandmother does the same thing.
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
she tried to handfeed me fritos while yelling "PENIS TRAIN"
My night consisted of weed, sex, and Mexican food. In that order. I think we found the keys to saving our marriage.
I hope your face alive. Lemme know if you are breathing in the morning. If not. Whoever is reading this tell me when the funeral for this awesome mother fucker is and we will rage at that event. Kthanksbye
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
I'm so sad at the lack of dick in my life I am going to get sauced and make rice krispy treats
Black labs can get you to do pretty much anything...even approach strange men in their bath robes
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
My hairdresser won’t do keratin treatments because of the toxins, but will put ecstasy up her butt at festivals...
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