Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
You were face down, at your computer, surrounded by beer bottles listening a bagpipes version of amazing grace.
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
You fell on your face and the waitress just brought you a fresh drink
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
This makes me miss penis. Not in a horny way... but in a sad, sentimental way.
i took a picture of my dick. with a stick figure drawn on it. and a paper hat taped to the tip. and i call i the mayor of Dickville
I swear the crows are laughing at me.
You my friend are stoned into submission
My fake id got more birthday sex than I've had in my life.
Drake has all the answers
The guy who said he's gonna suck your butthole till your face caves in is at Maggie's
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
One minute we're singing Wagon Wheel, and the next you're belly dancing in a trash bag on the beer pong table
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