So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
morning after pill = breakfast in bed
you broke a plate. told her her wedding china was ugly and you were doing her a favor. then proceeded to break every plate you could get your hands on.
Got a thumbs up from a trucker for doing lines on the interstate. God bless america.
apparently dick flashing is a frowned upon sport here..... sorry girlfriends mom
i cant answer while inside this church craft show. so unless you're outside with my engagement ring and a nonfat gingerbread latte, it'll have to wait.
Her idea of kinky involved a tazer
wtf?
I'm going back tonight
For every drunk face picture you send me, I'm gonna send a wholesome family photo.
What kind of outfit says I totes want you to take me in the airplane bathroom?
Thanks for fingering me to orgasm during Wu-Tang Clan
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
You just kept telling everyone to call you MFT.. Mother Fucking Tornado.
I NEED HELP. IM TRIPPIN BAWLS IN THE BACK OF MY MOMS CAR.
It's difficult when the romantic and the hedonist in me are fighting. I want him to respect me and hopefully pursue an actual relationship, but then I remember he fucks like a GOD and loves my kink. Oh, life's hard.
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