You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
So I've only had a mustache for about 5 minutes and I'm already pretty sure it's the best decision I've ever made.
I can only imagine the horrible things my future wife is doing on spring break right now.
I love you more than champagne and correct grammar
Most violent shit of my life. New Years resolution of eating better is already kicking me in the face.
Nope if you can't be there for me emotionally, then my vagina can't be there for you physically. That's my rule.
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
I lost the bet. I now have to do all chores sans clothing of any kind. I give it a week before I'm knocked up...
I can't believe you picked a finger in the ass over lunch with me.
Did I just hear you ask Siri about the meaning of life?
He tried to tell me that that stripper was his aunt..
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
Fuck you, dude, I'm not sharing my weed anymore if you're going for the Panthers.
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
Randomize
