So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
Today's lesson: while in the shower, one should choose between either drinking OR shaving. Not both.
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
Things are burning & the world smells of peanut butter. It's beautiful.
Ginormous penis in the breeze, cumming champagne showers into your eye
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
I am sleeping in the bathtub because my bed is too soft.
So yeah he had good weed?
How would your parents feel if we installed a sex swing?
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
Never let me go online shopping while drunk. I now own 2 baby cribs. I have no children
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
He dicked me, fed me creme brulee, and didn’t make a big deal out of me causing a flood to come outta my vagina
Marry him NOW
I was in line at Panera when I got the pic you sent to your coworker. I just showed your vag to a soccer mom. The vibrator was a nice touch.
No. It's going to be "I'm mad that it took you so long to get over here" angry sex.
Randomize
