I think I just got seasick
you're not on a boat
he has a waterbed.
Dude this girl just said she'd take me to pleasure town while giving me head
Will Ferrell is probably jerking himself off somewhere wishing he was you
i just cleaned out my toilet because i knew that my head would be in it later
How long after st. Patrick's day is it ok to shit green before I should seek medicial attention?
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
side note. good thing you didn't come to drunk breakfast. we were judged by children.
Stumbled into class and into a desk. When I fell my bottle broke in my backpack. I had to leave there was vodka everywhere.
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
In the pictures there's a flower in my hair and also a lobster, I need those things explained
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
I woke up naked on my couch playing a video game I thought I had dreamed about... oh yeah, and someone cut my hair.
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
She made me walk a straight line to prove i was sober enough to help carry you to the car
Knowing you it was perfect out of spite. Like. A line straighter than YOU
I planned to shave today but it's Friday the 13th I might cut something
Does it get any better than dating a guy with a vasectomy? The answer is NO. No it does not
Randomize
